More Clinton Flogging

Received an email this morning from a RWNJ acquaintance setting out the supposed sins of the Clintons. Maybe you've seen it:

Bill & Hillary: Worse than you thought & worth remembering , and this came
from a Democrat

Dear (Ex ) President Clinton:

I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, "Thank me, I voted for
Clinton-Gore."  So, I sat down and reflected on that, and I am sending my
"Thank you" for what you have done, specifically:

1. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica
Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broderick.
Did I leave anyone out?

2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral sex.  I had really
planned to wait until he was a little older to discuss it with him, but
now he knows more about it than I did as a senior in college.

3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place
(especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to
know is what the meaning of "it" is.  It really is great to know that
certain sexual acts are not sex, and one person may have sex while the
other one does NOT have sex.

4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new
generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie
"Wag the Dog" could be plausible after all.

5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look
graceful, Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful,
and John Kennedy look moral.

6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who have pled
the 5th Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to
avoid testifying about Democratic campaign fund raising.

7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4
imprisonment's from the Whitewater "mess" and the 55 criminal
charges and 32 criminal convictions (so far) in the other "Clinton"
scandals.

8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, "gutting" much
of our foreign policy, and flying all over the world on "vacations"
carefully disguised as necessary trips.

9. Thank you, also, for "finding" millions of  dollars (I really
didn't need it in the first place, and I can't think of a more
deserving group of recipients for my hard-earned tax dollars) for
all of your globe-trotting.  I understand you, the family and your
cronies have logged in more time aboard Air Force One than any
other administration.

10. Now that you've left the White House, thanks for the 140
pardons of convicted felons and indicted felons-in-exile.  We
will love to have them rejoin society.  (Not to mention the scores
you pardoned while Governor of Arkansas)

11. Thanks also for removing the White House silverware.  I'm sure
that Laura Bush didn't like the pattern anyway.  Also, enjoy the
housewarming gifts you've received from your "friends."

12. Thanks to you and your staff in the West Wing of the White
House for vandalizing and destroying government property on the
way out.  I also appreciate removing all of that excess weight
(China, silverware, linen, towels, ash trays, soap, pens,
magnetic compass, flight manuals, etc.) out of Air Force 1.
The weight savings means burning less fuel, thus less tax
dollars spent on jet fuel.  Thank you!

13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary enjoys the $8 million
dollar advance for her "tell-all" book and you, Bill, the $10
million advance for your memoirs.  Who says crime doesn't pay!

14. The last and most important point - thank you for forcing
Israel to let Mohammed Atta go free.  Terrorist pilot Mohammed
Atta blew up a bus in Israel in 1986.  The Israelis captured,
tried and imprisoned him.  As part of the Oslo agreement with
the Palestinians in 1993, Israel had to agree to release
so-called "political prisoners".  However, the Israelis would
not release any with blood on their hands.  The American
President at the time, Bill Clinton, and his Secretary of State,
Warren Christopher, "insisted" that all prisoners be released.
Thus Mohammed Atta was freed and eventually thanked the US by
flying an airplane into Tower One of the World Trade Center.
This was reported by many of the American TV networks at the
time that the terrorists were first identified.  It was censored
in the US from all later reports.  Why shouldn't Americans know
the real truth?

What a guy!!

If you agree that the American public must be made aware of
these facts, pass this on.  God bless America and THANK YOU
(once again) for spending my t axes so wisely and frugally.

SINCERELY,
A US Citizen
PS.
Please pass along a special thank you to Al Gore for "inventing"
the Internet, without which I would not be able to send this
wonderful, factual e-mail.

AND THE REST OF THE STORY Hillary Rodham Clinton, as a New York
State Senator, now comes under the "Congressional Retirement and
Staffing Plan," which means that even if she never gets
reelected, she STILL receives her Congressional salary until she
dies.  (Would it not be nice if all Americans were pension
eligible after only 4 years?)

If Bill outlives her, he then inherits HER salary until HE dies.
He is already getting his Presidential salary until he dies.
If Hillary outlives Bill, she also gets HIS salary until she dies.
Guess who pays for that?

WE DO!

It's common knowledge that in order for her to establish NY
residency, they purchased a million dollar-plus house in upscale
Chappaqua, New York.  Makes sense.  They are entitled to Secret
Service protection for life.  Still makes sense.

Here is where it becomes interesting.  Their mortgage payments
hover at around $10,000 per month.  BUT, an extra residence HAD
to be built within the acreage to house the Secret Service
agents.

The Clintons charge the Federal government $10,000 monthly rent
for the use of that extra residence, which is just about equal to
their mortgage payment.  This means that we, the taxpayers, are
paying the Clinton 's salary, mortgage, transportation, safety
and security, as well as the salaries for their 12 man staff --
and, this is all perfectly legal!

When she runs for President, will you vote for her?

How many people can YOU send this to?

Normally, I figure the longer Norsefires blame Clinton for every evil in the world, the longer it will take them to deal with reality, and the more time those of us who are not brain-dead, fascist thugs will have to try and take this country back. But I just can't let this go.

First, this has been circulating around the internet for nearly three years, with various attributions. Given that everything in it is a shrieking point straight out of Radio Norsefire and BTN, it is highly unlikely it was written by a Democrat. It probably wasn't even written by a single person.

On to the substance:
1. Actually that brilliant legal mind Ken Starr introduced us to these ladies during his illegally expanded Whitewater investigation. He had to find something to pin on Clinton after blowing $60 million.
2. Once again, thank Starr. None of that had a damned thing to do with anything, but Radio Norsefire and BTN needed shrieking points, so they made it into something. BTW, if US Citizen didn't know any more than that about BJs by the time he was in college, where did he go, BYU? And with all the closet cases there, he should have known about BJs anyway.
3. Not one work-place sexual harassment allegation against Clinton while in the White House has ever been backed by anything that can be called evidence. Kathleen Willey's story has more holes than Dick Cheney's hunting partners. As for outside the White House, Paula Jones's case was dismissed, although Clinton settled with her afterward to get rid of her. Juanita Broaddrick has flip-flopped her story so many times you'd think it was a pancake, and every non-whore journalist and attorney who has looked at it has torn it apart.
4. No, a Rethuglican Congress intent on a witch hunt introduced us to impeachment. The attack on Bin Laden was part of an ongoing and successful anti-terrorist campaign (that Chimpy muffed). See this link.
5. Whatever.
6. Try backing this with sources, assclown. You can't. I won't even go into all the Reagan/Bush people who were indicted, took the Fifth, were convicted, etc.
7. Ditto. There was one Whitewater indictment, and it was dismissed because the court ruled it was Starr who had broken the law. All the other indictments were of people who refused to co-operate in his illegal investigation. Go here to read about another "success" of the Blessed St. Starr.
8. Huh? Concerning travel, you seem to be confusing Clinton with Bush I (His term was also known as the "Anywhere But America Tour."). Concerning wrecking foreign policy, you're obviously confusing Clinton with Bush II. As for the military, is that the same one that, in spite of a direct attack on the Pentagon, was able to initiate an invasion of Afghanistan less than four weeks after 9/11?
9. See 8. More bullshit. And I suppose all those trips to Crawford, or the post-Katrina fly-over of New Orleans, or landing on an aircraft carrier, or McCain's recent tour of Iraq were all free.
10. Yep, he granted some pardons. And Ford pardoned Nixon. And we'll see how sharp Chimpy's pardon pen gets next year. Anywho, what's worse, pardoning people, or executing minors and the mentally handicapped as Chimpy did while guv in Tex-ass.
11. More bullshit. If there were any truth to this, the Rethuglican-controlled Congress would have had GAO torpedoes all over it. I have yet to hear "Fire one."
12. Yet more bullshit. See 11.
13. What crimes? Oh, maybe you're talking about Halliburton, Enron, and the rest of Chimpy's cronies. You have a hard time remembering which president you're talking about, don't you.
14. This is a lie. Look here. It was a different Atta. That's why responsible news media pulled the story.
Gore inventing the Internet: Norsefire shrieking point lie. Look here. This was wholly manufactured by RWNJ pundits.
Pensions: Lie. Look here. Ironic that a Norsefire should bring up pensions, given that the last three Rethuglican presidents have done all in their power to dismantle every middle and working class pension in the country.
Charging the Secret Service. Another lie. Look here.

There's enough bullshit here to fertilize every cornfield in Iowa.